I am...

I am
I am from Banana Trees, from Panama Hats, and Polleras.

I am from the Casa Vieja where my mom grew up, with its dark rooms filled with memories, of the stories Abuelo would tell us while we sat on the porch, of the piles of golden rice he kept inside, and the sounds of the crickets in the lazy afternoons during the summer.

Of no electricity and hauling water from the natural spring that flows next to that old tree, of riding horses, and eating guavas right of the tree.

I am from the Chiriqui River, roaring behind Abuelo’s house, and the algarrobo tree in their front lawn where we spent breezy summer afternoons, pretending to fly when the wind would lift the branches off the ground and we held on to them.

I am from Nochebuena y Año Nuevo spent with family and friends, of Carnavales y processions during Semana Santa (Holy Week), from Amada and Amelia and Carmen.

I am from the family sticks together, and love and respect your older sisters as if they were your mothers; of loving our cousins as if they were our siblings and standing up for those who can’t do it for themselves.

From respecting your elders and always doing your best in everything you do. Of being proud of who you are and where you came from, and of understanding the value of an education.

I am from being raised Catholic, from praying the rosary with Abuela, and knowing prayers that have been passed down for several generations. I’m from having faith in a God who is merciful and kind, of believing in ghosts, praying to saints, and never eating meat on Good Friday.

I’m from attending catholic school most of my life, while learning about mediums, psychics and the power of the universe. I am from a mix of catholic doctrine and indigenous beliefs, of going to curanderos when something hurts, while lighting a candle for your health to be restored. I’m the kind of Catholic I want to be, secured in my faith and my beliefs and not afraid to say I don’t agree with man-made rules.

I'm from Panama, Spain, and the Guaymi Indians, of sancocho, arroz con pollos, platanos and tortillas.

From the woman who wasn’t afraid to raise her daughters alone with only a 6th grade education, from sneaking down to the creek for a swim and not telling Abuela, of running across the swinging bridge without our parents knowing.

Of starry nights sitting on the grass telling stories about ghosts and La Tulivieja, and staying up all night afraid something was lurking in the dark. Of dancing in the streets during Carnaval under the blazing sun and the cool water; of patriotic parades on Independence Day.

Of Jose’s courage, and Abuelo’s strength, of Abuela’s faith, Mom’s determination, and of Dad’s daydreaming.

I am from the little bench Tio Dany made for me when I was 3 and that Abuelo has kept for all these years; of the wooden stove where Abuela used to cook, and the sewing machine where she would fix Abuelo’s clothes while whistling a tune.

I’m from dancing with Abuela after dinner, under the light of a kerosene lamp with Abuelo watching as he smoked his pipe. I’m from the moments that were never captured in film but will remain in my heart forever.

Have any of you seen this writing exercise? A while back, my girlfriends and I completed it and emailed it each other (we are scattered all over the country). I thought about it today.

I am not alone in this journey. I have the strength of all the people in my family, those who came before me and are no longer here, the ones who still are, and those who are yet to come. I am the person I am today because of all these people. They believe in me, and that's what will help me get thru the training, and will push me across the finish line.
FYI, some of the things are in Spanish so I'll give you the translation
Polleras- national dress of Panama
Casa Vieja- my grandparents (Abuelo and Abuela) old house
Amada, Amelia, Carmen - grandmother, mom, great grandmother
Jose- my cousin who died of diabetes-related problems at age 33. he was like my brother.
Nochebuena- Christmas Eve
Ano Nuevo- New Year's
sancocho, arroz con pollo, platanos, tortillas - traditional Panamanian dishes

I run because I need an excuse to eat!

Yesterday, I was craving a candy bar, so I got one out of the snack machine. After I ate it, I knew I had to go and run because I needed to burn all those calories.

So I headed to the track after I left everyone eating. Ran 4 miles! The first 20 minutes were hard because it was so hot and humid. I kept telling myself "just 5 more minutes", that became my mantra. I got to 30 minutes, and the mantra changed to "I made it to 30 min, let's go for 40 min".
I started to feel really good after 30 minutes and so I stopped worrying about time, and focused on intervals. Started with 1.5 min intervals and went down to 1 min. After I got into the groove of things, I started going 2 minutes. By the time I stopped, I ran for 3 minutes without stopping and could have kept going another minute. I was so excited, it was a great workout.

I was so tired I crashed and hit the snooze one too many times this morning. Thankfully the kids slept all night, they've been doing that a lot lately and I'm hoping they'll stick with it from now on.

I'm looking forward to training tonight, I need to get new music on my iPod. It's amazing what a difference it makes to have some good music with me when I'm out by myself. I don't want to stop because I want to keep listening to the music. Those of you with kids know, listening to your music is a treat. At my house, we listen to kids' music more than we listen to anything else. lol

New month, new attitude

I'm hoping to begin this month with a bang, and keep up with my training the best I can.

I hate that I missed Saturday but was still sick. To make matters worse, Braden got the same bug I had, so we were both sick most of the day. bah. I have finally regained my energy and will get out and run tonight.

This month is going to be a busy one for sure! We have dance recital on the 16th, the twins are being christened on the 17th, Father's day on the 17th, Half marathon on the 23th, Chicago work trip on the 25th... I'm tired already just thinking about it.

But we are getting closer and closer to the big day, I think when the countdown clock hits the double digits I'm going to start panicking. lol

Keep on running, marathoners!